i gave the design and layout of paper bluejay an update yesterday. only afterward did i noticed how grey, dark and gloomy it looks- much like my general demeanour lately. since january started, i have found myself feeling so tired. i could actually sleep the day away, something that is quite unusual for me. each morning, staying in bed until jeff is literally putting his shoes on at the door. the coffee he brought in an hour earlier chilled completely on my nightstand. i have spent days on end in my pyjamas while an endless list of half-started chores pile up around me. there doesn't seem to be enough caffeine in the world to get me up and going.
i know there are a few factors invoking this period of gloominess (or laziness). the end of a hectic and fun holiday season for one - all the excitement from the last 4-6 weeks is definitely catching up with us. the weather for another. winter is always a difficult motivator, and the grey skies and pouring rain make it that much more difficult. i have also been staying up later at night. where i once went to bed around 11, i now find the clock regularly striking 12 before settling in. of course, all these things run their toll.
there is an old zen saying: you should sit in meditation for 20 minutes every day, unless you don't have time. then you should sit for an hour.
i have never been good at meditating. i try, but like a lot of people, my mind wanders and eventually i am reciting the 43 things on my to-do list. i know its something that gets easier with dedication and practice, but as a busy mom, i know its unrealistic for me to flounder through being bad at something for too long before simply giving up.
i have had success with guided meditations though- someone softly speaking throughout the mediation and gently leading your thoughts and intentions during your practice. in addition to making some sleep adjustments, i want to spend some time every day for myself. meditating and shifting my attention away from being a sad, lethargic sack.
i recently found a series of guided mediations on the chopra centres website - all ranging from 10-25 minutes in length and on a wide variety of topics. i hope to use many of them in the coming months and will share here about my experience. I have also used the guided meditation below a few times now, and have quite enjoyed it. if you need a little recharge of positive energy in your day, why not give it a shot?